Lee Hotti and NJ Guidos are finished

Rest, you I-talian queens. Tamil Dream speaks five languages.

Fat Are People Too

I'm plump right now. Thankfully guys still ask me out on dates and someone special thinks I'm pretty all over, but it doesn't matter what anyone says when you feel like you look like a potato in your clothes. I'm going to ride my bike again now that it feels like Spring is coming back. NIGHTBIKE LIVES!!! (see the world's cutest, yet least updated blog by Amy Kellner: www.teenageunicorn.com for vintage NIGHTBIKE photos. Its waaaayyyy down there on the list of entries, but totally worth the trip).

Stuff White People Like just got a $350,000 book deal. Three months of the same joke (which I looooove) and they get to buy a house. Or half a house. I'm such a stalker I went so far as to follow the authors' links and look at what I suspect is their unintentionally publicly posted wedding pictures on their Flickr account. I felt weird and guilty, like I was reading my boyfriend's emails or something. It also kind of ruined the fun for me. I liked it better when the authors were two anonymous, slightly fat, bitter dudes from Brooklyn (in my head). Turns out they're a plain-type-of-pretty Canadian looking couple. They have hundreds and hundreds of photos of food that seem almost professional, but were probably taken with a Powershot. There are too many of them to have been snapped on well-lighted sets.

IM etiquette

IM is the worst but I use it everyday to make life easy (plans, iTunes swapping with pals, instant gratification, linkage, etc). Yet sometimes its like having your annoying neighbor knock on your door because they're locked out and you begrudgingly lend them your phone. I need to stop being such a wuss about my IM space bubble and just start blocking people. I've said this before: its like a tiny rape every time I log on.

Vincent Gallo

Okay so this happened a few years ago.

A friend of my friend was at some party and was standing near Gallo and there was this big dude that was yelling at him, because I guess that Gallo slept with his little sister and never called her back.

So the big dudes like "you didn't even call her back. How do you think that made her feel?"


and Gallo's all, "listen, I had to hear her talk about hip hop for 2 hours before i could fuck her. How do you think that made ME feel?"

ah-ZING!

Its close to the end

Its just crazy to me that Patrick Cleandenim isn't spending his life touring and being the best new musical talent in the entire world. His songs make me feel like skipping pebbles. Here's a happy video starring my friend Ingrid Sophie Schram III. This isn't even his best song. Rocket to the Moon rules. He's 21 or so and looks like The Little Prince. I bet its expensive and takes a ton of production to tour with a grand piano. Anyhow, the album is great and its on iTunes if you want it:



So I went straight and got a 9-5 starting Monday. I haven't had a 9-5 since I worked for Diane von Furstenberg 4 years ago, so this is major. I'm freaking out but still excited. Thanks Athena for hooking it up! I'm going to Banana to buy a white button down. Justfuckingkidding. My look will be sexy secretary pencil skirts, 4" heels and preppy sweaters American Psycho style. I'm scared. I can't believe I'm going to pack lunches and ride my bike to the World Trade Center every morning! EEEEWWWW Veevers is going boring norms for the first time ever. Thank GOD I'm finally out of fashion. Barf I hate fashion people they SUCK. Anyhow, I guess I have to kiss my adventureous life goodbye. I had a good run.

So long going to the museum whenever I want during the week when there's no crowds. So long freetime, bartending, and people watching in Soho at my cafe. So long working for myself and traveling far away. Goodbye going home for the winters and reading in the middle of the day. RIP touring with The Virgins. You guys were fun to live with in hotels for awhile. Its grownup time now.

Happy weekend. Its my last weekend of freedom before I disappear and turn into everyone else. Maybe I will start listening to Adult Contemporary and taking pilates. I hope I don't become invisible now. We have til we're 40 before people stop caring if we're alive or dead, right?

Veevs

Stamina

I mentioned this before, but the Stamina party is in affect at The Whitney Biennial. Agathe hired me to MC the original event which was videotaped for 24 hours. She is redoing the dance marathon for one week as some sort of living art piece for The Whitney. Maybe you'll catch me in some of the videos or photos of the event. I have no idea, because I'm not going. I am in a weird, anti-social vibe right now and don't want to leave my apartment. All I want to do is make things and write and eat and think about the future. I've been a real shut-in ever since I got back from California.

Anyhow, if you live here you should go to the Park Avenue Armory and dance. Its free and there are tons of good DJs. Agathe is a wonderful woman and I'm sure will make this extremely fun. If you go, please email me and tell me all about it. I will live vicariously through the young and the restless until I snap out of this "me" time.

One Month in Veeversland

Hello friends. I've been home for three weeks now. I left San Francisco where my family, best friends from high school and my special person live. I have to skip the end of that trip since I can't remember anything more than being bummed that I had to leave the beauty of Marin (specifically Bolinas and Mill Valley). Long story short, I'm back. I'll start from LA, where I went for one week before returning home to the East Coast. Here are some highlights. Okay... SO!

Had a party at my favorite place in all of Los Angeles: M Bar. Its an old man Japanese piano bar that nobody goes to. I hope and pray it doesn't get taken over by the stupid fucking hipster army that I probably unknowingly marched in during my formative years. RIP trendy me.

At first no one came and I sat there alone like a worry-wart while the staff asked me repeatedly if I was okay and if I wanted to sit near Gary the 70 yr old Vet. Gary is the Norm of M Bar, who I did eventually sit with til Margo and Ben showed up.

Steve Lee with the nicest person in the world, Ako. Being around Ako is like eating homemade Mac n Cheese while watching a John Hughes flick. Just feels good. I just asked our mutual pal Josh Wildman who has known Ako since he was wee to see if he has always been so sweet. I'm a bit jaded and can't believe I know someone who is just so naturally nice to everyone. Answer: yep. He's just an angel, confirmed and verified.

Camille and Sean aka Har Mar aka Ron Jeremy. That joke never gets old. Look at how in love with her he is. You lovestruck little man you, Sean.

Oh is that Fab from The Strokes at my party? No big deal. Its not like Sean brought him and I got drunk and told him he was gorgeous on his way out. Its not like Drew Barrymore randomly showed up at the end of the night with her new boyfriend and everyone watched that uncomfortable trio try to laugh it all off. As I said, no big deal. I mean, I totally didn't care or anything, whatever.

Jay Johnston Love o' My Life, Camille, Ben, Sean. If you read my last LA post you're probably having a little dejavu because this is exactly what I did with the same people on my last trip. And I'm doing it again in two weeks when I go for Aska's bday. Stay tuned...

Here is a pile of us. I wish I'd taken more pics of everyone, because I missed some of my favorite folks. One of my readers Thomas showed up and introduced himself and voila! Now we're friends. Kind of a neat way to meet someone. Hi Thomas!

Spanky and Steve

Hmm... is that Fab from The Strokes? Oh, did I mention him already? Sawry, I already forgot. Sidenote: the shaggy guy sitting next to Fab was a toad. Everyone hated him, yet no one knew who he was other than some kind of producer for VH-1. I know because he repeatedly mentioned it, including during a 30-second break he took while making out with some girl. It went kind of like this:
girl:(kissing) "nom nom nom... so, you're a producer?"
dude: "nom nom nom... yeah, for VH-1 nom nom nommmm" (more kissing)

Jeff and I passed the hell out at Jay's house like grownups do, then shot beebee guns and played with toy helicopters for hours, like grownups.

I hit every single beer can in a row!

Later I went to Jane's print studio. She sells beautiful, high end, hand-printed wallpapers and textiles to rich people. Check it out www.inluxurydesign.com. Jane is one of my best friends. I inherited her from an ex-BF about 5 years ago. Theenks Paul!

After Jane's, Camille and I went to brunch, got our nails did, went to a liquor store to play the lottery (didn't win) and then stopped by Opening Ceremony where I bought some gifts and she bought shoes. I should mention here that Camille is crazy and walked into the liquor store and O.C. barefoot like Britney Spears, yet somehow won over the entire staff of both locations with her hilarious and very special form of crazy. Pretty much funnest day ever.

That night Spanky locked himself out of his house so I met him at another favorite bar of mine on Sunset: Coach & Horses. We bro'd til closing then went over to meet Jay and play with his toy helicopters. Spanky explained the innerworkings of the skate industry to me, something I know nothing about. Did you know that those kids live in houses owned by their teams for free, travel the world like rock stars and make tons of loot putting their names on skateboards and t-shirts? I had NO idea. I didn't realize skating was so lucrative.

This post is getting long so I will leave it here. All in all, it was an extremely fun week. Next comes the wedding of the year, starring Danika and Jeremy. If you are a regular reader, you may remember them from The Most Boring Christmas Ever post. This wedding was not boring. More later...